MeaTBaLL SoUp

Mom cooked MeatBall Soup for breakfast. Yummy.. yummy.. My all time favorite. I was trying to use every sense of my taste buds when suddenly I got diz FUNNY call. Well, some people don't know how to ASK questions properly. They juz need more practise. They like to jump into conclusion and portray you as a SEXY LADY in red with two horns on top and long sharp pointed tail and a....? Hmm, wat u call the thing they carry around? I juz listened n decided to keep my mouth shut. I pity dat person actually.
My favorite yummy meatball soup started to taste weird. It turned sour and bitter. I learned at school, the only thing dat link to your tongue is your nose. Datz y food taste funny when u got flu.. Guess not.

TART

Holiday will be ere soon.. And the last holiday for 2009. Christmas holiday.. Im not celebrating Christmas. I juz like it cuz it's holiday. Hihi. So.. My idea of a perfect holiday is hang out with best friends at the rite place on the rite time.. Ahaha.. We all did hang out.. Rite time rite place.. Last month 5 days straight. So many shocking things happened this few months. So my last holiday diz year is sumthin dat I really need the most to summarize my life..
Hmm.. Where do I start? I broke up with TART.. Not his name. Juz a nickname dat I used to call him. I don’t even remember how did it came out at first place. As u all know.. Im broken-hearted. I cried myself to sleep every nite. It sounds pathetic but I'm not ashamed to admit it cuz sure almost every human has been through same experience like mine. That's totally normal so I can consider myself normal too. I spend most of my time hang out wit my best friends, clean up anything.. anything to keep myself bz.
I was like hell for the past few months. Then along the winding road.. I realize dat everybody cares bout me.. Thanx people.. Sumbody cares bout me..
I 'dissappeared' few times. I didn’t pick up calls. I didn’t reply any msgs. I spent whole day in the bedroom.. I was trying to get myself back on track. I was mad n sad n confuse so I went to a place where I could calm myself down n think straight again. A place where I spent whole day indoor watching my fav movies n surfing the internet n playing games n free meals. My gramma's place. Hihihi. I feel a bit better now..

TouGh Ride

The goin gets tough lately... Work, friends, family.. heart! Ehe..

Work.. Hmm.. My bossy boss with his daily agenda.. money money money..

Friends n Family.. No prob. Lurv you all.. Thankz for being there to wake me up from da nightmare....

Heart.. Hmmm.. Mmmmm.. Ehe.. Yup.. the exact prob actually.. Let's put it this way.. It's not a prob.. Juz another challange in life. Sounds better. Talk bout it later......

FasTing

Finally.. Fasting fasting fasting.. Hopefully posa tahun ni dapat bertahan.. Huhuhu. I spent my first 3days of Ramadhan with my family. Then I went back to my place. Everyday.. 5pm sharp I accompany my friend AC berbuka since dia dgn hubby dia jak. Maybe she doesnt want me to spent my Ramadhan alone. Musuk isnt around. He's bz.. I dunno n I dowane think about it. So back to the berbuka part. Actually, everytime berbuka kami berempat cuz her hubby ada sorang kawan juga which can be consider as my friend also.

Now I wonder wat am I trying to tell ere. Izit bout the fasting month or the berbuka part wit her hubby's friend..? Ahahaha.. Since he's always around.. it starts to feel weird if he's not. Nggeeee.. I call him OTROMAN cuz of his hairstyle makes his head looks like ultraman figure.

Juz a Feelin'

Im a bit mad at him yesterday n still.. today.. Im not sure if the word 'mad' is suitable to describe wat I really feel. It's kinda hard to explain in words. I dont talk like usual.. I juz 'Mmm', 'ok', 'aha', 'Hmm'.. He knows sumthin isnt rite but Im mad at myself also. Why the hell am I supposed to be mad at him. He doesnt even know... Not a thing.. I never explain. I never tell him the truth.. so the response for sure = ignorance.. So who do I gotta blame...? Ok ok ok. ME!

Di4RieS

Nuttin much to do today. Juz the mandatory like sleeping n breathing. Im takin a day off. Other than dat I juz sit ere browsing, searching, typing n clicking. Sumhow.. I managed to clean my room n I found my precious... Ahahaha.

After so long I opened back all my diaries. Not really all of it since I started to write diary since I was in highschool n of course few chapters are missing.. N my most favourite will be my lil black book with lots of sketches in it. I like to draw o sketch by the way. Wateve u kol it. HUhuhu.. Reading all the diaries feels like traveling through time. Guess.. it's ok 2 go back 2 da past sumtime. Juz 2 remind me bout life. Who I used to be.. Where I used to stand.. All the crazy stuff dat I wrore.. anger, frustration, joy, love.. bla bla bla. The ups n downs. How it actually taught me 2b who I am now.

Reading all these diaries feels like standing on top of a mountain where u can see almost everything... which makes me wonder how wonderful n horrible life can be in a split second. Sumhow, I can summarize my life.. few years back.

I found my fav poem in there sumwhere.. My fav songs when I was in campus. My ehem ehem.. dont have to mention the name.. Hihihi. Funny. Isn't it fun when u can actually smile n laugh when u read back all the stupid things dat frustrated u long time ago. So, diaries are like soul healer.. it tells me dat it's ok to be unhappy or to have problems now cuz sumday when u finally get over it all.. It will become a chapter of ur book of life n the title will be 'Point to ponder' or 'Life's Like That' or 'Laughter is the Best Medicine'. Or maybe it can be reminders.. Did I learn sumthing from it? Am I goin 2 make da same mistakes? Am I a better person now? But foremost.. it's not about did I or did I not successfully went through the dark black hole.. it's all about HOW n WHAT I've learn after the rise n fall.

GrandMa

I miss my grandma everyday.. I miss her a lot.. She's my idol.. She raised me til I was 8.. I still remember my Yellow Musuk Blanket.. I couldnt sleep without it.. Kecik2 dlu.. p mna2 pn bekepit dgn blanket tu.. Ada la satu ari tu aku tertinggal blanket aku tuh ntah d mna sbb bawa skali blanket tu p men ngan my cousins d blakang uma d kampung. Mlm tu my grandma cari my blanket sampai jauh mlm sbb aku tak dpt tidur.. I miss her so much. Then.. blanket tu dah koyak rabak sbb cousin aku p lilit kat pokok mangga. Hahahaaa.. My grandma jahit blanket tu jadi bantal kecik malam tu jg pas dia cuci n keringkan guna iron.. Tu cuma small part of the story.. My grandma is the best.. byk pengorbanan my grandma for me.. even now.

Dah besar panjang ni pun.. kalu balik kampung my grandpa bagitau yang my grandma kekadang susah nak tido sebab bimbang aku tinggal sesorang kat uma. Ye la.. dah keja ni jauh dari family n I live alone in my small cute house.. Sumtime she wud kol in the middle of da nite asking samada aku dah kunci smua pintu.. Dah makan ke belum.. makan maggi jak ka.. dah mandi..

Ada sekali tu aku baru masuk keja n belum dapat gaji lagi so aku balik kampung pun duduk uma jak. Tetiba tengahari tu grandma ntah ke mana. Balik petang tu dia hulur sampul. Rupanya dia p bank kuarkan duit nak bagi pinjam kat aku.. My grandma tau sangat aku xkn trima kalu dia bagi so dia cakap ini kira pinjam. Aku nak nangis jer.. Tapi aku tak amik. Aku bagitau yang aku ada duit simpanan juga sebab sebelum ni aku keja..

When I was in highschool I was damn lazy.. Malas nak belajar.. but my grade was good so I tot kalu lulus dah kira okay la. My mom slalu ngadu ngan my grandma. My grandma nasihat aku slalu but I was so young so keras kepala ckit. Selalu balik kampung tak gi sekolah. So one day, i went back to see my grandma. N ponteng la tu. My grandma wasnt around dat monink. She went back home around 12 with book and pencil. Then, my grandma bagitau yang dia ikut kelas untuk orang2 tua di kampung tu.. Malam tu my grandma n me duduk2 kat meja makan after dinner. My grandma wat keja uma. Even mata dah kabur2.. jari pun dah keras nak menulis.. dia cuba juga menulis dan cuba hafal alphabet yang di ajar di kelas. She said.. kalu dari dulu dia belajar menulis dan membaca mungkin dia boleh ajar aku waktu aku baru masuk sekolah dulu. My grandma belajar smua tu semata2 mo tolong aku belajar. Sedih tul aku. Since dat day aku blajar betul2.. tapi bab malas tu susah skit la nak kikis. But here I am today.. got my degree.. got a good job. It's all for my beloved grandma. My granda.. a mom, a bestfriend.. my life!

I share everything wit her.. Dunno wat should i do without her.. I love you Grandma.. owez do..